orgasmic hamsters

orgasmic hamsters






Tuesday, June 27, 2006

of fouls , cheers and a celebrated local referee

soccer-betting has now soared to ridiculous heights at the peak of the world cup season.

on top of the plethora of various betting systems already available ( and confusing the minds of virgin pundits like me ) , you know can bet on stuff totally UNRELATED to the gameplay itself.

like now you can actually bet on total ball-possession. not entirely unrelated but ball possession doesn't really mean much in a match , and besides how the hell is one supposed to predict the percentage of ball possession since it is highly unstable ?

more preposterously there is the kick-off bet , where u place your moolah on which team kicks off first , decided by a deft toss of the coin by the captain of a team just before the match starts.

in a nutshell , the fate of your money lies in a coin. heads or tails ? consult mother Gravity.

the match last night between Australia and Italy was a total ripoff. i watched with bated breath along with mark's aussie friends in between balancing pints of draft beer , hoping that the socceroos will not disappoint. they didn't, they played very well in fact but the fucking referee had to award a totally undeserving penalty to Italy at the very last minute. REFEREE KAYU LAH KNN !!!! SURELY KENA BRIBED ONE !!!


sidetrack : ghana is down 0-2 to brazil as of now ( a little after 45 mins ) .... pardon the disappointed tone , i'm an underdog supporter lah ! the second goal should have not been though , since it was obviously offside ! my dad is now cursing non-stop

a little update about the going-ons in my life. i am awaiting mark's return in about a week's time , yeah !! he was so disappointed that his motherland lost yesterday. poor boy.

haven't been sleeping alot because it is the dreaded deadline week for my school assignments. to make matters worse i still have to work at the pub on some days due to shortage of manpower ! i haven't been home for so long before 10pm that i was actually excited about going home early just now , planning out the TV programmes i would want to watch and a short itinary of things-to-do. finally caught Little Britain on Arts Central , damn funny lah !! dry british humour rocks my socks. also indulged in a little me-time in the bathroom with my newly bought shea butter scrub from Origins. shiok.

and oh , i caught my as of now anonymous friend stealing my dior lip-gloss a few days ago. she didn't exactly steal it per se but stole it on the pretext of borrowing it and claiming to have popped it back into my make-up pouch when i asked. i shrugged it off and bumped into her later in the evening with the exact same shade of plum on her lips.

it was like deja vu , because about a week ago my collegue borrowed my MAC eye-liner and "lost" it under the same ruse. of course i've never doubted her but after what has just happened , i fear that i have lost all trust in everyone.

after all , forgiving is passe. if you don't cover your ass , nobody else will.

thou shall never believe my friends again.

going for a nap now , since im more interested in the 3am match later. SPAIN VS FRANCE !

quote of the day from the film v for vendetta ( one of the best films ever ) :

"behind this mask is an idea , and an idea is bulletproof."


Monday, June 19, 2006

on hiatus!

booyah !

its not like i have NO time at all to update but everytime i reach home all i wanna do is to have a little conversation with my friends online and go to sleep or to watch footy. ( or maybe surf some porn )

you wouldn't believe how dedicated i am to the world cup now. like for example despite being really tired after working at the pub i still managed to be persuaded to catch the korea vs france match at 3am with mark's friend. AND YES KOREA PUT UP A FIGHT ALRIGHT AND DREW WITH FRANCE !!! tsk tsk ! and zidane will be missing the next ( and very crucial ) match.

i love the atmosphere watching live matches in public. i love watching with bated breath as the ball gets dribbled around flawlessly with expert feet. i love it even more when asian teams score.


i reached home an exhausted heap but only managed to sleep a pathetic hour ( the time now is 8 fucking am ) before waking up as fresh as a daisy. just as well , i have to meet up with the project mates for a discussion later.

its hard not to wish my life would remain like this forever. i have great friends , a super family with vodka-imbibing ten year old cousins and for the first time ever i actually have a few really interesting and normal guys ( no 40 year old paedophiles or psychopaths this time round. wooo ! ) presumably interested in me. to top it all up , i'm doing perfectly okay in school and i have a job that pays well and is fun.

okay , it would be really much better if i could win every match i bet on. hahahha. esp in matches with fantastic payouts !!! i placed $5 for australia to win last night against brazil. it was absolute madness to do so but hey ! the payout was $55 , dammit.

and yes.. australia lost 2-0. but its only because australia slightedly faltered in defence rather than the skills of the the brazil team which led to their triumph , if any consolation at all.

will probably start blogging again after the world cup ends =D

take care y'all


listenin to : no doubt - don't speak


Saturday, June 17, 2006

crude joke of the day

"Dad , may i please go to the party ?? Everyone else is going !!"


"Pleaseeeeeeeee dad !!!"

"Okay , but you'll have to suck my dick first"

"Dad! You're disgusting ! I'm not going to do that !"

The daughter retreats into her bedroom , disappointed. To add insult to injury , her friends calls her up and tells her that they are all going.

She mulls over it for sometime and decides that she really wants to go. So she goes to look for her dad.

"Okay dad , i really wanna go to the party. I'll suck your dick."

"Good girl."

So the daughter pulls down his pants and to her horror she discovers that there is shit on her dad's dick.

"Dad ! there is shit on your dick !"

"Well , your brother wanted to go to the party too."


Friday, June 16, 2006

god save the queen!

reporting to you live from an apartment in tampines..

final score - ENGLAND 2 TRINIDAD & TOBAGO 0 !!!!!!!!

okay so england's performance was rather dismal right from the very beginning till they got roused awake after experiencing the throes of death. was excited when rooney went onto the field but as expected he was slightly sluggish.

then the agile monkey scores !!!!!!! honestly crouch looks so fragile that he looks like he's going to keel over any second.

then gerrard scores a very pretty goal !!! and he is cute.

sounds mighty weird but i actually kinda bonded with my dad through the world cup. daughter and father duo cursing non stop in front of the tv screen and almost always supporting different teams. lol.

i'm glad england has qualified for the next round and i certainly do hope that they will go on to the finals though it feels wholly impossible if they don't buck up !

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post-match madness. was goin to do it on my face but i don't think i want to smear my face with poster paint !


Wednesday, June 14, 2006


today , i returned him the keys to his apartment.

he's due to fly to germany in a couple more hours and won't be back for another month.

i decided to discontinue unecessary "affections" with him because he's too busy to feed my attention seeking self but hey , who knows i might change my mind when he comes back. after all i have a month to think things through =)

and no i did not get cheated -_- why am i even bothering to explain!?!

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the ugliest mannequin in the world. ha !

auralgasm : alanis morrisette - you oughta know

i love the line where it goes "and are you thinking of me when you fuck her?"


Wednesday, June 07, 2006


i've failed marketing for the 3rd time already and its driving me absolutely crazy.

which means i'll have to remodule it. AGAIN.



Sunday, June 04, 2006

something like it

it amuses me to see a 6 foot tall man being reduced to nothing more than a disarmed oversized infant.

the last sentence i heard him utter before he succumbed completely to the sandman was "mmm , spoon" , the spoon referring to of course the sleeping position so popularly adopted by couples.

but i'm not a big fan of "couple" sleeping positions , because they restrict my movements and it isn't exactly comfortable to have a heavy hairy arm across your waist.

yes , it was all cuddly and sweet and endearing for the first 30 minutes , to feel someone's breath warming your neck , to feel wanted. then the numbness sets in because you're unable to move for fear of waking up your partner.

making sure mark was fast asleep ( about 90 agonising minutes later ) , i slowly lifted his arm ( a very delicate maneuver that requires precise movements ) and breathed a sigh of relief before creeping out of bed and admiring him for a few moments ( i really dig the sight of men looking vulnerable haha ) . because he was occupying more than HALF of my pillow and bed space , i hopped over to the other side where i thought i could finally retire in peace.

har har. right.

a few minutes later he apparently discovered the absence of his warm human bolster and i don't know if it was a spontaneous reaction or he woke up momentarily because the next thing i knew my shoulder was cradling his chin and very heavy hand was curled around me , and i was falling off the bed again because he was unknowingly pushing me towards the edge by deserting his pillow for mine.

and was that a satisfied grin i spy on his face !?!

mark's a surprisingly quiet sleeper and to my dismay , a sedentary one as well. i was wide awake the entire time save for the few pockets of sleep i managed and when i did finally manage to coax myself to sleep he was already up and nuzzling me awake with his scratchy stubbled kisses.

i appreciated my boy with his taut freckled back turned to me as he slapped on the shaving cream and looking very much retarded while grinning through the white fluffiness. and for laughing at him , i got shaving cream all over me as well. heh.

i am perfectly happy for now , i don't know how long this relationship is going to last and despite the major differences in age , lifestyle and even habits , i shall take a relaxed stance and enjoy whatever's coming my way =)

and yes he is very very very cute , has gorgeous eyes with long curly lashes and is probably even more obssessed with neatness than me. perfecto.


auralgasm : dishwalla - candleburn


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