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Pissed. Very.
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Above was my half-hearted attempt at imitating Yoda. Not very convincing.
Anyway.
Hands up , those of you who goes to BBQs and permanently glue all ye fat asses to the seats , waitin to be served by those toiling over the blazing hot pit while you PAINSTAKINGLY wait to be served those plates of freshly BBQ-ed food.
That happened to me yesterday. Of course , being the sweet and considerate girl that i am , i volunteered to help out with the face roasting procedures of turning raw and squishy blobs of flesh into edible eatables.
I was quite willing in the beginning , very in fact , while swaying my cute perky ass to the beats of Usher and his gang. But that was because i was all freshly powdered up with nary a drop of pespiration on my body , as i were to find out 15 min later. I was still bopping away happily when the salty drops made their unwelcome presence on my brow because i was really happy . Don't ask me why. i get happy very easily.
Anyway.
The chicken wings and the fishes were really nicely marinated by Kai fong. Well done , you.
Enough of the disgression.
Dear old Nicholas was grabbing all the stuff that looked cooked enough off the pit faster than you can say 'chef's chocolate salty balls!' , distributing all his illegal stash to Yan , Pei and a few others. I wasnt really pissed at first , but when i started peeling the prawns with Edwin for our consumption and Nic came to steal the food as usual to give the girls , i was seriously miffed and so was Ian who made his displeasure known by commenting very loudly , sadly unheard of to those guilty.
DID YOU KNOW HOW DISGUSTING IT IS TO PEEL THE FREAKIN PRAWNS?! THEY'RE SERIOUSLY SLIMEY WHEN YOU START TWISTING THEIR HEADS OFF AND THE BRAIN JUICE OOZES OUT ! AND THE PRAWNS LEFT A STENCH ON MY DELICATE FINGERS ! SO I DO NOT SEE WHY I SHOULD GIVE UP THOSE PRAWNS TO YOU!
Okay , that was an unintentional outburst. I know , i'm selfish . BUt not as selfish as those who patiently wait for the food to be served to them. Fuckers.
Icouldnt control myself anymore when Yan started complaining.
Yan : So boring ! Nothing to do !
Me : Go and help to cook , lah ! ( sarcastically )
Yan : DON'T WANT !
Me : WHY
Yan : BECAUSE I DONT WANT , LOR !
Me : Don't want then don't want , lah !
I walked off after that. Immediately i had the evil notion of pressing some glowing red hot coals onto her face , Pei's and the rest . Of course i didnt.
So after BBQ-ing again to simmer down i went to sit down with them and everything was normal again when i casually asked Pei why she didnt want to help out with the cooking. Her nonchalent answer ?
"I'm wearing contact lens .. They will melt if i BBQ !"
THAT WAS SUCH A STUPID ANSWER I WANTED TO SPIT AT HER.
Of course i didnt , i just smiled and acknowledged her very dumb answer. Didnt want any more unpretty outbursts at such a gathering and furthermore she's my good friend.
HOW CAN A CONTACT LENS MELT BY THE WAY!?????????? IT WON'T !!!!!!
Damn , i wonder how the heck people can believe such urban legends. So what if contacts are plastic ?
HELLO!?
Its not your everyday tupperware-sque plastic !!!!
Besides , how HOT can the BBQ be ? The buttons on my shirt didnt even melt in the scorching heat.
AH. But then again , people will resort to ANYTHING when searching for an excuse.
That was , by the way , one of the most non plausible answers i have ever heard in my entire 18 years. Thank you , Pei !
The episode blew over in the end , i guess keeping quiet is still the best after all among good friends. Pei , Yan , Ping and Me went home together after the so-so two days of chalet. More on the chalet to come , this post's just an outlet to vent my extreme frustration. I still love them all dearly :D
What an anti climax eh ?
What do you mean , do you think i'll stop being friends with them just because of this ?
There you are , Fiona Tan presents you , her aggressive and petty side.
