orgasmic hamsters

orgasmic hamsters

 

 

 

 

 

Wednesday, September 15, 2004

--
Irrelevant post of the day
--

Okay , i said i was going to post so here i am even though i am practically falling apart at the seams ( or joints , rather ) because i am so damn tired.

But a promise is a promise.

Okay shut up you.

I am going to repeat whatever i had typed into my handphone two days ago while i was on a crowded train.

Yah lah , i do that all the time , using my handphone as an impromptu writing pad to jot down ideas.

ANYWAY.

I am going to repeat it word by word.

"Stuck in a train with freaks cutting off my supply of fresh air. Looks like Jacques Cousteau didn't invent the Aqualung for more than just one purpose.

Move aside , cosmetics. Looks like surgery is the make-up du jour , having heard so much about it i've always got my kicks from looking at pictures of celebrities with botched surgery but being surrounded by not one , but three specimen in close proximity looking like the main characters from Planet of the Apes , it feels ..... entirely different.

This lady about two feet away from me is scarily pale. And she has commited one of the worst fashion mistakes ever - Over-plucking her eyebrows which she (gasp!) didn't bother to draw. And she has really bulbous looking lips that only silicon implants can give.

And i do mean HUGE. Her upper lip is so fat , its almost hanging over her languished lower lip.

Whatever can be worse ?????

Bright red lipstick on those fish lips. HORRORS.

Another one has.. Guess what.

BLUE..

Nope , not eyeshadow.

Not even Lipstick.

BLUE EYEBROWS AND EYELINERS.

Not that she's trying to be in vogue by trying out psychedelic colours on places one would usually colour with brown tones , but obviously because the cosmetic tattoo she got eons back has faded and in place is a digusting looking bluish-green colour.Gross. And she has protuding jaws.

I told you it was like reliving a scene from The planet of the Apes.

It's during trying times like these when you feel like screaming and the lady standing next to you is so close that you only need to stick out a tiny sliver of your tongue to taste her salty sweat-stained face.

To further worsen matters , she smells like she has just finished a year's worth of prayer sessions at some temple because she smells like a walking incense stick.

Or maybe she's just using some cheap imitation of Dior.

Well , gotta count my blessings. At least she doesn't smell like she needs to visit a doc to remove her sweat glands or something. "

Yeah. Thats it. I just had to do something during my arduous 15 minutes and i just ranted and ranted. And those were the results.

I've just decided to make it a weekly affair to thank people for the things they did , starting from today.

----

Thanks to :

Julynn : For staying up late just to hear me complain even though she had to wake up at 5.

Jerel : For not killing me while doing 140 on the highway. Just kidding. For the rides.

K : For the books.. For the notes .. For the dinner..For causing the bruise on my big toe.

Joel : For the cheesecakes!!

Soryan : For not blaming me for almost screwing up her birthday BBQ plans.

Mr Harpic : Burp!

--

ZZZ. Sounds like a boring post to me. Writer's block due to my fatigue i guess. Well its just not the same when you're updating just for the sake of updating and updating because you feel like it.













 

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