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Affected.
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Lots of stuff got me thinking recently and its affectin me real bad .
My seemingly perfect life suddenly took a wrong turn.
I wished i could just shrug the opinions of others off like some ( my respect if you're one of 'em )
But instead i let it all go to my head.
For the past few days i've heard some very unpleasant stuff about myself.
Like.. being a flirt .. being selective about the friends i make ( in other words : arrogant ).. ignoring my friends etc.
I don't why i want to clarify it since i haven't done anything bloody wrong but i really really really want to make myself heard.
1) Being a flirt : Number one , the fact remains. I am very single. I'm sick of being single.
Just when i thought i could finally settle down , the other party pulled a fast one on me and went back into his arms of his ex without tellin me anything.
He has made no attempt to contact me , much less offer an explaination.
Fuck you , asshole. i hope you fuckin burn in hell with your blatant lies and denial.
Anyway.
As i was saying , i'm sick of being single. I go on dates with different people. I go on dates to know people.
So what ?
I'm SINGLE , for fuck's sake !
When i mean date , i mean a purely chaste one.
You know , like coffee bean , cinemas and malls ?
Nope , not beaches or parks.
No kissing , not even good night kisses. No holding hands , no touching , NIL. NONE.NADA.
You should seriously go out and get a life if you think dates evolve around sex , you perverse moron.
I am not desperate. Being sick of being alone is not desperate.
If i was , i would have gotten attached long ago and hang onto the arm of a different guy every week.
If you were attached and still went on dates , obviously its a different matter altogether.
And one more thing.
I NEVER expect a guy to pay for me unless he persistently insist .
And so i can safely say that i am not out to empty wallets.
And no , i don't just go out with anybody. Only if i feel that you're a person without a questionable character and yes , sincerity and the time we have known each other counts.
Which isn't alot . Maybe like , 4 ?
Speakin of which i have more guy pals then female ones .
Because i'm rough and not into pink.
I curse , i swear , i point middle fingers.
I watch soccer.
Hell , i even play soccer.
Okay i digress.
But at least now you know that most of the times when you see me on the streets with some guy , 90% of time , that guy is a brudder.
Like you know , he kicks and punches me like any other guy and i do the same to him.
Burping and farting together too.
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2 ) Being arrogant : Just one sentence for this : If i was , i wouldnt be doing the things i normally do ( like sipping coffee at a coffeeshop ). Damn , i stay at a HDB flat like any of you !
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3) Ignoring my friends : Too many a time my friends go "Fiona , why don't you like introducing your friends to us ?" . Well , simple. Because i don't see the need. If all my friends knew each other , then my life would be a really sad one. I need my privacy too. I can bitch about one person and never get caught because they don't know each other. Get what i mean ? You certainly can't do that if all your friends knew each other.
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I am really pissed , upset , disappointed and all the synonyms of these words.
Because everything negative came from friends whom i thought i knew so well , and vice versa.
Not anymore.
Thanks for making me feel down .. Thanks for making me cry after so long. Thanks for making me reconsidering my character.
I know its weird to hear such emotional confessions but hey. You know i'm just being honest.
