orgasmic hamsters

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Thursday, November 18, 2004

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Malaysia , truly asia !
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Anyway thats supposed to be the slogan of Malaysia's Tourism Board.

I don't how but my family managed to persuade me to join them on a one day trip to Malaysia on during Hari Raya ( Sunday )

I was damn reluctant to because of two reasons.

1) I had to wake up at bloody 5am on Sunday morning to avoid the traffic jams on the causeway

2) i realised that it was not a self-drive trip , but we would be following a tour on a bloody coach.

From my experience , coaches are really smelly , parasite-infested and dusty.

Not surprisingly , the tour group that my family followed consisted of mainly aunties their young gregarious kids.

I started snoozing the moment i made myself comfortable in the coach , and i was so refreshed by the time we arrived at the Malaysian immigirations that i even managed to wish the immigration officer a "Selamat Hari Raya" and i bet that it really made his day .

Anyway.

First stop : Orchid Valley.

I've never ever heard of this place , being a someone who has never been a fan of ornamental flowers or plants.

Give me a trek thru' the jungles of Pahang anytime , man.

Arriving at this decrepit run down place parading as an orchid garden , i started slapping away at my arm.

Damn those mosquitos.

The artificial waterfall near the entrance's dry , but barely 5 minutes after we stepped into the place ( which we paid Rm5 for per entry ) , muddy-looking water suddenly burst forth from the top.

Did i mention that it sent the "Aunties" into a flurry and cameras were suddenly whipped out fron nowhere and kids were made to pose against the backdrop.

What the fuck ?!!!

Get a life . The waterfall's not even two storeys high.

I found this sight really funny , it kind of sums up the pathetic state the place is in. Fancy turning on your waterfall only when vistors arrive.

I arrived at the conclusion that visitors were a rare occurence, hence the rousing welcome from the er , park rangers ?

I soon saw why the place was so run down and quiet.

Despite its grand sounding name of "Orchid Valley" , the place doesn't even remotely resemble a valley , and neither does it have any orchids.

All i saw were rows of overgrown and sad-looking patches of green.

I was so bored , i started doing things i would normally never do , like snap pictures of roots and bricks.

The day dragged on , visiting so called "places of interest" which never interested me , like tropical fruit farms and fishing villages.

It was kind of sad actually to see kids getting excited over the mere appearance of the kampung chickens and other kinds of fowl running free in the fruit farms.

In the not-so-distant future , our children may have to rely on books to actually see how a chicken looks like.

Where have all the spider-catching days of yonder gone to ?

Okay , i digress.

The only time which i really enjoyed myself were the hours of naps in took in between stops , and when we managed to gatecrash a stranger's wedding.

HELL YEAH !

Yes indeed.

Our tour guide was silly enough to reserve tables for us at a restaurent where a wedding dinner was about to take place.

Maybe the newlyweds were not very well-off , thus being unable to book the entire restaurent.

Anyway , i was kinda embarrased to be having dinner when someone else is walking down the aisle.

I discovered that malaysian weddings are really old-school , complete to the bright gold and pink ( and very tacky ) decor , to the music being played.

The music sounded suspiciously like it came from a chinese new year compilation.

Of course , i'm not stereotyping malaysians lah.

ZZZz. I'm tired. I shall continue tomorrow. Please ignore the grammer/vocab/spelling mistakes should u spot any.. Brain malfunctioning lah ! Good night.













 

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