orgasmic hamsters

orgasmic hamsters

 

 

 

 

 

Friday, March 25, 2005

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omg dad what are you doing !?
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My dad has a major issue with trust.

Or rather , the lack of it.

On the not-so-rare occasion that he decides to come back to check on me , he would invariably rummage through the rubbish bins in my room and the kitchen.

He thinks i don't know , but i do !

What does he expect to find ?? Used condoms ?!

There was an incident a week ago when he suddenly barged into my room holding an empty lighter between his fingers and demanding why the hell it was there.

"What is this ? You smoke huh ?!"

The first thought that came to my mind wasn't about giving a plausible reason regarding the lighter , but how he actually managed to find it among the pile of used sanitary pads , tissues dripping with mucus and day-old food.

Its disgusting la.

The actual reason why i had the lighter with me was because i accidently kept it when i borrowed it from my friend to light up my ciggy and since it was almost empty he didn't ask for it back.

And yes , if you must know , i'm a social smoker.

Anyway.

So i was pretty flabbergasted and i burst out "Why the hell did you look into the bin in the first place ? Thats so gross !"

"Just tell me why this was in the bin. Why , you become smoker already huh ! Very sat ki hor ?"
"Come on lah ! Equating a lighter to smoking is dumb can ?"

"Then explain this"

He leaned against my bedroom door swirling the stupid lighter around his fingers and i can't help but think about this thing he was holding in his hand rubbing shoulders with my pads. LOL.

"Aiya , my friend's one la. Played around with it then forget to return him lor . As simple as that. Up to you to believe."

What a blatant lie.

Obviously my dad took none of it , he just sighed in resignation and left me alone.

Which is quite a rare occurence because usually he'll just start shouting at me and digging out skeletons from the closet to make me feel really guilty.

So the moral of the story is :

Parents are sneaky creatures. Always dispose of unwanted evidence into the rubbish CHUTE. Nowhere else.

Oh by the way.

Technology is proving to be a hassle in my case.

Recently my dad got himself a swanky new MMS-enabled phone and horrors ! He has learnt to use it.

Now , i can't lie about my whereabouts because he will ask me to take a photo of myself with my surroundings. ( and its impossible to take a photo beforehand because my dad is one bloody smartass cus' he will ask me to do something like "take a photo of your surroundings without your glasses/your palm against your cheek etc" so its damn hard to foretell what action he wants me to do )

Before you jump to the conclusion that i'm a bad daughter who's always lying to her dad , don't.

Being an only child , i'm under constant surveillance and it totally sucks to have someone watching your every move .

Lying is the only way i can do whatever i want even though its bloody obvious that my dad doesn't believe what i say most of the time anyway. heh.

Oh , and he never fails to piss me off when he starts comparing me to his wild younger days with anecdotes like "Don't think i don't know you young people .. You think its very cool to smoke right ?? Wah so cool sia , smoking ! *holds an imaginary cigg and starts puffing it* Let me tell you this , i have been through everything so don't think i don't know !"

SO DRAMA LOR !

And it makes me cringe because he thinks that by saying all that he's being a role-model. Rather , he just makes me feel that he's tryin to indirectly tell me that he was a cool and funky guy when he was young .


You're a has-been , dad ! FACE THE FACT !


----
listening to : Mudvayne - Not falling

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