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the death of a marriage
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Saw this while ironing my Topshop singlet yesterday ..



WTF?!

Of course i don't , i run towards a fire in the event of one and proceed to strip myself of the clothes i am wearing to dispose of them into the fire.

Burn , clothes , burn in hell !!!!!

Or is that some kind of culture practiced by the good people of Mauritius ? ( which happens to be one of my dream destinations . Ahh. The idyllic island life )

Anyway.

I think i have fear of marriage/co-habitation which is probably quite uncalled for but i can't help feeling this way because i look like a freak at home.

When my dad's at home , i will try my best to coop myself in my room because i am embarrassed to let anyone see me in my "tousled" state , no , not even my dad ( of course the bigger reason being i just wanna avoid my dad in case another arguement arises )

Each and everyone of those who used to be or is in love with me probably is in love with this person



Mosaic-ed because my pout looks absolutely nauseating and yes i KNOW MY MOUTH IS UGLY LA !

She's neat and she looks harmless enough.

BUT!

What do YOU know ?



Pic taken just a couple of minutes ago and i swear i did not fluff my hair up deliberately. Yes , i am still looking like that even as i blog.

Now that is what i call WILD !

Everyone now ..

Born free... As free as the wind blows.. As free as the grass grows.. Born free to follow your heart !

I know , i know. Many will refute by saying that they look as shitty when at home but hey , i have stayed over at my friends' place before and they look like nothing , not even close , like what i look like when i have just woken up.

At most , a few stray strands of hair across their face or maybe traces of dribble down their chins but thats about it.

But not me !

Because my hair is short and incredibly layered , it takes at least 5 minutes ot styling to get them in place and though i don't really need make up , i still feel freakish without a touch of blusher and my trusty eyebrow pencils .

I am so disgusted with how i look in the mornings ( Or when i'm home alone ) that i find my reflections revolting to the point that i avoid looking into the mirror altogether and i put on my make up/style my hair without glasses on so that i will see the presentable side of myself when i put my glasses back on.

Wait , just check out what i'm wearing now !

Presenting Fiona Tan's Spring/Summer collection !!



Half-tucked in al-cheapo camisole so worn that the fabric's already thinning and super unflattering running shorts pulled so high and taut ( Think camel toes. LOL !! JUST KIDDIN )

Actually this is already considered okay when compared to what i usually really wear , which is a pair of granny undies ( how gross but oh so comfy ) and nothing else since there's usually nobody at home to interfere.

Which brings me to my fear of getting married.

Okay to be fair enough , i'll probably mind how i look in front of my hubby and make an effort to look good enough for a quickie in the morning by running my fingers through my hair to give it a shape.

And of course , wear nicer looking stuff.

But how long can i maintain it before i go back to my old ways and probably paving the way to a divorce ?

Everyone has idiosyncrasies and i have cultivated mine from staying alone for too long.

I do alot of random and shocking actions at home . I think i've mentioned it before in a previous entry but anyway.

I like to sneeze and yawn in a really loud and exaggerated manner Why ? My usual sneeze sounds like a mouse and forcing myself to roar like a lion somehow and curiously makes me feel de-stressed.

A crazy habit of lying down anywhere whenever i feel like it. On the kitchen floor , under the dining table. Everywhere. I usually lie down for 10 minutes for nothing.

And etc etc , some which i am too embarrased to even mention. Ha !

Oh and i totally dislike sharing my remote control. I dominate the TV , you asshole ! You watch what i watch !

So tell me , which sane guy is able to accept his wife being like me ? Sigh.

I'm destined to be a spinster.

Oh , morning breath ( both mine and his ) too.

SCARY.

By the way ..

I went to this interview for a new part-time job with my ex-collegues and all of them got shortlisted except me !

WTF !

We all came to the conclusion that i looked too rebellious for them since i made a big mistake of turning up for the interview with heavily lined eyes and an all black outfit.

I remember getting criticised for my larger-than-life loopy earrings by the interviewers.

Well , fuck you then.

You think what , i will look like that for work meh ?

Peabrains.

Yah , actually i'm quite "sour grapes" la.

But i can't help but feel offended for getting judged by what i wear .

Alright time to head out ..

I have been so busy during the past few weeks of my holidays and i don't know for what !

And my love-life is again , non-existent.

He was too enthusiastic , and i was too nonchalent.

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listening to : Nicky Li Jiu Zhe ( AGAIN ! ) - Jie Tuo