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Wednesday, June 01, 2005

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eavesdropping
---

I beseech all of you people to practise DISCRETION when using your handphone.

Hollering into your phone in a crowded train when it has just entered a tunnel and hence the poor reception will NOT magically restore the reception in any way.

Just yesterday , i was in a train so packed that i could lick the shoulder of the person next to me just by slightly extending my tongue.

As you all know the NEL line is an underground train system.

Which means bad reception ( fuck M1 ! 99.8% coverage of the island my ASS ! ) .

So it happens that this fiery mother hopped into the cabin that i was in and she literally screamed into her phone for everyone to hear.

She had badly permed hair , her eyebrow tattoo job had faded into an obnoxious sea-green and of course , a wonderful fashion sense as well.

Think huge shoulder pads and chunky PVC platforms.

Woot~

Anyway.

Being the diligent blogger that i am , i just had to share what she said with you so i was industriously typing what she had said almost word by word into my phone.

**Translated into english to the best of my ability without losing the "feeling" . By the way , from her accent , i conclude that she is from China**

"AH BOY AH ! Where your elder brother HUH!"

"WHAT ! He still haven't come home ! SO LATE ALREADY !!! WHERE HE GO HUH!"

"THEN YOU KNOW WHAT TIME HE IS COMING BACK!?" ( funny , the poor little brother doesn't even know where his elder bro is , much less know what time he is coming back )

"then what you want for dinner ? then your brother leh ? he not eating dinner at home ? then where he go sia !" ( the same question for the third time running )

"don't eat KFC lah !! so oily ! i tar pau chicken rice for you already !" ( wah lao , if she had already bought dinner , why still bother asking her son what he wants to eat only to criticise his choice ?!)

"you got do your homework or not ! later i come back check and you never do i confirm you will regret one hor !!"

"don't argue with me , i am already reaching home. you watch out !"

She then hangs up the phone and realises that all eyes are on her.

BUT.

Instead of looking embarrased she proceeds to blink her eyes in a pissed off manner and she even had the cheek to go Tsk audibly.

Speaking of phone etiquette , i laughed my ass off when i had to call Jamie while i was in the train and since i did not want to commit the same mistake as that woman , i whispered into the phone and the funny part is even though she was at home , she whispered to me as well and i did not realise it until 5 mins later and in between guffaws i managed to ask her why she was whispering as well and she replied

"dunno leh ! natural reaction i guess"

LOL.

Damn funny la u.

By the way , any medical experts here ??

I think i have what the experts call repetitive wrist injury or something , which is caused by typing too much or using the mouse for too long.

I really think that the latter is responsible for the prolonged aches i have above my right wrist since it is where i rest my hand when i use the mouse.

HELP ! Am i going to lose my hand ?!

Before i end this post , i would like to make an earth-shattering annoucement..

*drumrolls*

Gopi , my infamous manager is RESIGNING !!!!!! ( refer to my archive for my stories about him.. i can't find the exact link leh. can any kind soul help me ? :D )

OHMYFAWKINGAWD !

GOOD BYE , OH GOOD BYE !

I WILL NOT MISS YOU , BUT I MIGHT MISS YOUR FAKE ACCENTS BECAUSE THEY MAKE ME LAUGH .

--

listening to : disturbed - liberate

 

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