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on why i hate dating
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Let's say i met a new guy , Joe.
So Joe is an average Joe ( hahaha no pun intended ) , a typical tertiary student without any major flaws such as BO or bad dress sense and cute enough to look at without gagging.
After the few mandatory phone calls and what-are-you-doing-now smses , he asks you out for coffee and you agree.
By the end of the second date , female instincts tell you that he is interested in you.
Jolly well but the problem is , the feeling is not mutual.
You tell your friends about your dilemma and inevitably the reply is
"Then you better stop leading him on..."
Sure it is easier said than done , but ..
1) The only way to stop "leading him on" is to reject him straight in the face and the consequence is a no-brainer because he will invariably start avoiding you and the friendship will definitely fizzle out. I certainly do not want that. And besides two dates is too early for me to actually forge any sort of feelings for a person.
2) The second way is to continue going out with him but without the blatant rejection line and instead continue seeing each other on a platonic basis but that will still cause your friends to shake their heads at you and deadpan that "you're still leading him on.."
What i meant by 2) was , unless i obviously carry a torch for you , you'll never be able to see me exhibit any of my i-am-interested-in-you-too signs such as a lingering good-night kiss if you send me home regardless of the number of times we have went out on or an obvious reluctance to part.
I think guys should learn to read the subtle hints better , it'll cause alot less unwanted anxiety and guessing and false hopes.
I think its a catch 22 situation , not unlike an arguement with my dad. There's always two sides to a quarrel with him and always , no matter what stand i choose to take , i always end up losing.
If i remain quiet , he'll yell at me and go "why , you at a loss for words ah ? Are you listening to me or not or ? Am i talking to a wall here ?"
And if i do make some sort of statement , he'll get even more worked up and accuse me of talking back at him.
As of now , there are 3 slightly more prominent male figures in my life. One of them is super mr nice guy who is apparently is willing do to anything "just to make me happy" ( yah balls , thats what they always claim , pre-commitment ) , the other turned up at my door just now to send me breakfast , and the last one , someone i've completely lost faith in .. Ah well.
By the way i find it a big-turn off for a guy to say something along the lines of "my shoulder is for you to rest on" whenever we're seated and i'm yawning or slumped lazily across some wall.
Even if i do have the intentions of resting on your shoulder , that killer line will make me have second thoughts. I don't know why , it just makes you sound desperate i guess.
Its almost like asking for a kiss or a bad pick-up line.
I have met too many guys who start pouting or giving me the puppy-eye look whenever i have to leave for other appointments after a date as if i have to spend the entire day with them.
Or insecure morons who look over my shoulder whenever i am replying messages.
Okay time to work , bye.
